Posts Tagged ‘Porn’

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Porning on Planes? Give me a break.

September 15, 2008

It’s not like this wasn’t predictable even ten years ago – internet availability on planes had to happen because everyone’s addicted to the internet now. Heaven forbid if I can’t Twitter/Facebook/Myspace during my flight. And because we all know that internet was invented to host sweet, delicious porn, this current scenario with people looking it up during their flights comes (haha, come) as no surprise.

I mean what good can come of anyone watching porn during a flight. The idea of sticky seats, blankets, tiny bathroom areas and magazines is just a bit more than I can handle. Of course not everyone decides to act on their arousal when watching porn but let’s not forget what tends to happen most of the time and the very purpose of porn. I mean I can watch people have sex on any number of HBO or night-time cable programs but porn just serves an entirely different purpose. And usually I can defend public sexual acts as I’m a culprit but a plane is just too small and with an audience too close. On a plane there’s next to no chance that you won’t get caught jacking it, so where’s the thrill? I think we can draw the line at hard core porn when it comes to website filtering on flights and I’d even go so far as to have the attendants [politely] stop passengers from viewing whatever homegrown or store bought stuff they bring along.

I think we can all wait a few hours on a plane to watch porn in the comfort of our hotel rooms, where at least you know everything’s already covered in sex juices.

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Sexy movies > Porn

September 9, 2008

 I just saw Quills in its entirety today and I don’t if it was Kate Winslet’s

Sinful

Sinful

bursting bosom, Joaquin Phoenix as the smoking priest or the erotic nature of the whole movie but that movie left me very much hot and bothered. So much so that upon cumming, my teeth went numb for a few seconds…that’s never happened before. Hot damn.

I think that this reflects on my selective sexual stimuli because Lord knows I watch a lot of porn without such impactful results. The end result orf watching hardcore porn is usually a sketch or a few laughs. I do appreciate a bit of dialogue in porn but that’s just to humor myself. Movies, better yet films, with steamy but usually softcore sex scenes get me going a lot faster – I mean have you seen Secretary? Jesus. I even have better luck with erotica than porn these days which I think means that I appreciate romance and empathize with characters going through the motions instead of just going for it….which I think makes me the typical lady, actually. Maybe my tastes are on the kinky side but ultimately the quick fuck takes a back seat to some killer foreplay and dirty talk.

Oh so steamy

Oh so steamy

I need some more sexy movies – I mean, what else am I going to do with my free time?

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Government Spends $$$ To Find Out If Women Like Porn

August 20, 2008

The Article on ABC News

Or don’t read it, all you need to know is that the National Institute of Health (NIH)  gave $147,000 to Northwestern University to help them find out the effects porn has on women.

Upon reading it I didn’t really think about if this was too much money or what the study found or if the experiments make any sense. Reading it, I couldn’t help but think what the government gets out of the findings. Still knee deep in the Kinsey biography, I note that Kinsey got his money mostly because of the vicious spread of VD and the government’s interest in sexual deviancy (and hope to “cure” it). There were a few supporters who were genuinely interested in the study for study’s sake but I can’t imagine that’s the case anymore.

So, women like porn and?…now they’ll be too busy masturbating to it to have babies?! I don’t know! What on Earth justifies $147,000 to the NIH? Does porn cure cancer? Do women who watch porn turn into lesbians or nymphomaniacs? I just don’t know why NIH wants this information and I’m dying to know. Maybe I don’t trust my government to just want this study performed for the sake of women everywhere who want to know what other women are up to when it comes to Throbbin Hood or Lord of the O Ring.

I demand answers!

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Guys Gone Wild – What Straight Women Crave (??)

August 3, 2008

Last night my friends ( two girls and a guy) and I decided to watch the original Guys Gone Wild. I didn’t know what to expect; having seen a number of Girls Gone Wild movies I wondered what ultimately dissatisfying softcore teases would await me with regards to college guys. To my amazement, the Guys Gone Wild movie mirrored the Girls version almost EXACTLY:

– Guys bared their chests and asses usually in the shower while soaping up their [flaccid] genitals

– The camerawomen goaded shit-housed, fairly reluctant guys to do whatever they wanted them to with little to no incentive

– Streaking, drunken yells, dancing, drinking, shotty camerawork, “WOOO CANCUN WOOOO” were all ..yeah you get the picture.

The one thing missing however was the homosexual interaction, a near signature part of any GirlsGW movie. So, we waited like fools for men to make out – it got really close at some points – but it never happened. We were briefly entertained by drunken ramblings, half assed meatspin attempts and a handstand but eventually had to look elsewhere for decent entertainment (we later turned to Puppetry of the Penis, porn bloopers and meatspin.com)

Maybe I’m not boy crazy or straight enough, but I just can’t imagine any woman getting turned on by these videos. They aren’t particularly insightful, voyeuristic or rare visions, which I think is the idea behind GirlsGW; I know for a fact that most [American] college guys would be willing to show their goods sans alcohol, any incentive whatsoever or shame. It’s also likely that I’m uncomfortable with this kind of objectification of men in porn probably due to the fact that’s it’s tough to come by elsewhere. Men on the other end of leashes, whips, and verbal abuse don’t rub me the wrong way like camerawomen lying to them (oh you’re SO HOT, yum, etc) to get them to strip.

Maybe when I’m older I’ll long for the time frat boys were willing to drunkenly drop trou’ for me. Maybe.

In my heart though I know the Girl’s Gone Wild people made this to diffuse some of the concerns on the company’s objectification/mistreatment/disrespect of women.